Just ask FullMetal!
by AuroratheFallenAngel
Summary: The whole Fullmetal Alchemist crew are here for questions! :
1. The crew is here!

I have gathered the whole Fullmetal Alchemist crew so anyone can ask them any questions that you want. :)

Al: Us too?

Ed: Of course us! We're the main characters!

Al: Of course we are brother!

Ed: *face palm*

Al: Brother?

Ed: Don't say anything Al! Just put your questions in the review section please! 


	2. Letters set 1

First set of questions are here! Lets get started :) (Note: This is meant to be writing like a script because there are so many different characters. I do not own FullMetal Alchemist.)

Our first letter is by PrinceVeggie. His question is:

Yeah I have a question. How do Roy and Ed feel when yaoi of them is produced? And is any of it canon? And if so doesn't that make Roy a pedo?

Also, how do all of you guys feel about Edward Cullen?

Roy: "I think I speak for both Ed and me when we say that stuff we read of yaoi is discusting! I know I'm sexy and all but why do I have to be paired with pipsqueak over here?"

Ed: -yells- , "Who are you calling a pipsqueak he can only be seen with a magnifying glass you jerk!"

Roy: -sigh- "Anyway, some stories I've seen are way not even canon. I don't even like him at all! I have better means of spending my time than having sex with FullMetal. I would rather spend my time planning for when I become Fuhrer and trying to get all of the female officers into mini skirts."  
-evil grin-

Ed: -pushes Roy out of the way- "My turn! First off Roy don't speak for me! I can speak on my own! Second me and pony boy? That's just nuts! Just look at him!  
He's not even good looking! Second I have no idea what the hell canon means so I'm just going to say no. Roy a pedo? Hmmmm...that wouldn't surprise me."

Roy: -Furious- "I am not a pedo! I never was and I never will be FullMetal!"

Ed: Whatever...

Roy: Edward Cullen? Who is that?- picks up his note sheet- Oh wait according to my sources he is a "vegetarian" vampire, has been 17 for over 100 or so years sparkles in the sunlight and falls in love with a human named Bella."  
-looks at paper- Sparkles? What vampire sparkles? I know Armstrong sparkles but thats just Armstrong, he doesn't need a reason to sparkle. So the author is say that this kid is over 117 years old? He looks like a 12 year old who hit puberty early! I thought vampires were supposed to wear black and be vicious creatures! I think this Stephanie Meyers needs to read Dracula a few times to understand the true meaning of a vampire!"

Ed: Like Pony Boy said. Sparkles belong to Armstrong not some fairy who lives in the woods who stalks a girl he likes for a living. He's been 17 for over one hundred years? Has he gotten laid? Probably not!  
He's the 117 year old virgin or something! What the hell is vegetarian vampire? Does he suck the blood of vegetables or something! Bella, what kind of name is Bella? Seriously this author has bad taste in names and she's probably the worst author out there! Do me a favor and burn it and pick up an Alchemy book instead! You will actually learn something useful! She ruined the good of Edward name forever!"

Well thanks for the questions PrinceVeggie! It seems that Roy and Ed enjoy arguing about that fairy. I mean vampire.

Next question is by Bloody-Neko-Princess. Her question is:

Yeah so here's a question for Envy and Ed~nya.

What is guys think about all Edvy Yaoi fics (EdXEnvy)~nya?

Ed: What the hell is with all this yaoi crap? I think that some people have no lives!

Envy: I'll be right back. I have to go throw myself off a bridge.

Ed: We don't have any bridges in Central!

Envy: SHIT! I'll make my own then!

Ed: You do that! I'll jump right after you jump.

(Ed don't do it! The fangirls will kill me. T~T)

Ed: Anyway...I think that people need to stop thinking about me and roy together or me and -shivers- envy. I'm a guy. I like girls not guys! Can you hear me! I like GIRLS!"

Envy: I hate to admit this but for once your right! They could at least match you up with a better person. Like you and Al. -laughs hystericly-

Ed: -throws up- Gross! I would never in my whole life have sex with my own brother thats just fucking sick!

Envy: -Still laughing-

Ed: -transmutes a sword-

Envy: I see how it is FullMetal. If its a fight you want then get ready!

-They start fighting.-

Well it seems that those two are too busy fighting. On to the next question!

The next question comes from KingofHeartless'09. His question is:

Why is Ed a blonde?

What is your favorite food Al?

Ed: Well the reason I'm blonde is because I was born that way! I don't need to explain it any further than that!

Al: Please be more nice brother.

Ed: -grumbles-

Al: My favorite food if I could still eat would have to be my mother's apple pie! When mother was still alive she would always make them for us.

Ed: She always made the best apple pie.

Al: She did...

Ed: I remember that one time we ate the whole thing at once and we didn't even eat dinner because we were full of pie.

Al: I remember that! Mother got mad with us for not eating dinner.

Ed: Yeah...

Awwwww it seems that our two heroes are remembering the good old days! I think I will leave it at that!  
-

This was the first set of questions! Keep sending questions in. The cast loves to answer your questions! 


	3. Letters set 2

The next set of questions is here! Everyone is having a blast answering your questions (Ed: I'm glad I don't have any stalker girls after me! Me: Ed don't jinx it.) Lets get on with the questions!

First question is by ELOSSS Alchemist. She says:

ed:

why do you always wear that red coat...even in the desert, or warm areas?

do you like winry...as in LIKE winry?

is automail heavy?

al:

why do you like cats so much?

what would you be doing if you weren't with ed?

do you read and study alchemy as much as ed?

ps. i find it adorable how you call ed 'brother'

Roy:

how do you feel about ed, like as a person or co worker

do you LIKE riza?

do you like dogs?

Why did you steal havoc's date?

why do you hate paperwork?

Winry:

of all tools, why do you JUST chuck WRENCHES at ed? i feel that hammers would do more damage ;]

why do you have so many earrings? couldn't you just change them instead of wearing all of them at the same time? [reference to OVA: simple people]

how hard was it installing autmail in ed [or anyone really]

riza:

why do you choose guns instead of any other weapon?

Royai?

do you honestly like being in the military?

do you like ed, al, or winry [as a person]

all: coke or pepsi [sorry! i always ask that!]

Ed: Another alchemist. Perfect. The reason I wear my red coat everywhere is because the weather changes alot so I like to be prepared, that and I'm too lazy to put in my suitcase. I DO NOT LIKE WINRY! She is my friend! Friend!  
No automail isn't heavy. It seems like it but its actually lighter than it looks.

Al: I like cats because their so fluffy! Who doesn't like cats?

Roy: I hate cats!

Ed: Shut up pony boy and let Al finish!

Roy: -gets silent-

Al: Thank you brother. If I wasn't with Ed I would probably would be helping Winry with her automail business. I guess.

Winry: You mean it Al?

Al: -nods- I will if you don't throw wrenches at my head.

Winry: -holds up a wrench- You mean this wretch!

Al: -holds up hands in defense- YES!

Winry: -evil grin-

Al: Brother help!

Ed: Hey Winry look what I got! -holds up a brand new tool set-

Winry: Yay tools! -runs and gets tool set leaving Al alone-

Al: For your last question, I don't really read as much as Ed. Thats because he's the state alchemist not me. Thank you. -smiles- I've done it since I was young.

Roy: My turn! To answer your question I think that Fullmetal is an okay person but slacks way too much.

Ed: I do not slack!

Roy: Who still hasn't found the philospher's stone?

Ed: -balls hands into fists-

-Al comes and gets him away from Roy-

Roy: -sigh- I don't like hawkeye but she is a good coworker and friend. I love dogs! They follow my commands better than anyone else! They don't need to be paid and plus they make great companions! -smirk- I stole Havoc's date because that man is so desperate for a girl that he wouldn't probably notice that she was gone. Everyone hates paperwork! It gets piled so high on my desk I can't see over it! When people come to talk to me I literly have to stand on my chair to see them or I have move from behind my desk to see them. It gets very irritating!

Winry: I throw wrenches at Ed's head because I always have them with me. Hmmm... thats not a bad idea! Thanks for the idea!

Ed: I hate you ELOSSS Alchemist!

Winry: Shut up! I'm not done answering her questions! To answer the rest of your questions is because they were my mother's earrings and I don't want to lose them so I wear them all at the same time. That and I don't want to lose them. It is very difficult putting on automail. It has to be very careful or I could kill the person I am trying to install the automail on. Putting automail on Ed was even more difficult than it was putting it on Ed. He is my friend and I hate seeing him in pain. Thanks for the questions!

Riza: Well to answer your question, guns are easier to hide from the enemy and I feel more confident using guns. They are easier to shoot and I don't have to get too close the enemy to use it. I feel safer. Thank you for the question.

Roy: Yes, I like being in the military. I love to boss people around. It makes me feel powerful.

Riza: I like the military because if I had a bad day or stressed because of people -points to roy- I can just go to the shooting range and practice. Its a good stress reliever.

Roy: What are you implying here?

Riza: -shakes head- Nothing colonel.

(Last question bitches! :D)

Ed and Al: Coke!

Riza: Pepsi!

Roy: Coke!

Winry: Aren't they the same thing?

-Everyone face smack-

Well thanks for the questions ELOSSS Alchemist! Everyone loved answering your questions. Except for Ed. He's mad at you for giving Winry the evil idea of throwing hammers at his head instead of wrenches. (Ed: Its not funny!)

Anyway the next question comes from Res Nullius.

His question is:

Ed:

If you could choose one of your personality traits to pass on to your children, what would it be?

Al:

For reasons that cannot be explained, cats can suddenly read at a twelfth-grade level. They can't talk and they can't write, but they can read silently and understand the text. Many cats love this new skill, because they now have something to do all day while they lay around the house; however, a few cats become depressed, because reading forces them to realize the limitations of their existence (not to mention the utter frustration of being unable to express themselves).

This being the case, do you think the average cat would enjoy Garfield, or would cats find this cartoon to be an insulting caricature?

Mustang:

What do you value most in life? Do you eat babies with BBQ sauce?

Winry:

Why didn't your mother slap you more as a kid?

That's all I got for questions for now. ROY MUSTANG FOR FUHRER!

Ed: If I could pass one of my personality traits to pass on to my children if I ever had any, it would have to be attitude. It helped me get out of some tough stuff but it got me into more trouble then I already was. So probably that would have to be it.

Al: uhhh...thats a good question. I think that they would find Garfield insulting to them because Garfield is lazy and fat.

Winry: He isn't fat, he's just really fluffy!

Ed: Fluffy my ass! Just look at him! He's the fattest cat out there!

Winry: Is not!

Ed: Is too!

Winry: Is not!

Ed: -getting angry- Is too!

Winry: -getting angry- Is not!

Ed: Is too!

Al: Brother!

Ed: -annoyed- What Al?

Al: I'm not finished answering her question yet brother.

Ed: -frustrated- fine!

Al: I don't like Garfield because he is a discrace to cats everywhere! -pause- okay now I'm done brother.

Roy: Finally! My turn! The thing I value most in life is my friends and their safety. Being coronel, I want to make sure my commrades are safe! If it wasn't for them, I would be fucked.

Riza: -sarcastic- Thanks coronel. Why to boost myself esteem.

Roy: Anytime luenit!

Riza: -sigh-

Roy: I do not eat babies! Thats just fucking disturbing! I would never do anything like that!

Winry: -gets angry- My mother slapped me! I should go over there and fucking throw wrenches at your fucking head!

Al: Brother, I'm scared!

Ed: -slowly nods head- Me too... lets make a run for it!

Al: okay...

Winry: Where the fuck do you think your fucking going you two!

-Ed and Al run- -Winry chases after them with a wrench in her hand-

Thanks for the questions Res Nullius! Everyone loved answering your questions. Except Ed and Al who are currently running for their lives from Winry's wrath. I hope Winry doesn't kill them... The fangirls would kill me!

Anyway put your questions in the review section please! PEACE! 


	4. Letters set 3

Hi there! Here is letter set 3! Lets get started!

Our first question is by xangelsintheskylinex18 and she says:

HAahahah this is great! I hope you update soon! And if questions are still being accepted here are a few:

1) What does Ed and Al think of the incest stories about them? XD (I thought the reaction would be amazing)

2) What does Ed and Riza think about the fanfics about them as a couple?

3) What does Riza and Roy think about the fanfics about them as a couple?

Ed: What the fuck! Me and my brother! Thats just fucking sick! How would you like having sex with your own sibling who is also the same sex as you!

Al: I don't feel so good...

Ed: I don't think that is even possible for you to get sick Al! Your a fucking suit of armour! You can't get sick!

Al: Well I don't care! I feel sick because of what I just read brother!

Ed: I have to agree with you. I hope that the writers who wrote that stuff know that once we get the stone that their asses are ours! -evil laugh-

Al: Brother...your scaring me!

Ed: -stops laughing- Fine...next question. Riza and I? Riza is Pony boy's girlfriend not mine.

Riza: I am not Mustang's girlfriend!

Ed: Don't lie Hawkeye!

Riza: Well your Winry's boyfriend!

Ed: -yells- I am not Winry's boyfriend!

Riza: This isn't working! If we were a couple, I would be breaking up with you right now!

Ed: If we were dating I would be glad that you were breaking up with me!

Riza: Next question. Me and colonel? I only like him as co-worker.

Roy: I don't like Riza. She is a good friend and co-worker and that is it!

Riza: Agreed.

Thanks for the questions xangelsintheskylinex18. Everyone loved your questions. Well kind of. Al and Ed are mentally and physically scarred for life. Ed and Riza are now 'broken up' and Riza and Roy are alittle suspicious.

Next question is by jpbrat10. His question is:

Here's a question for Scar-

What would u do if a teenage girl ran up to you and hugged u and called u awesome and hot?

Scar: I would probably kill her. But I haven't been called hot or awesome before... -shakes head- What am I saying!  
I've become to soft! Must kill something!

Well Scar seems to be confused on his motives now. Poor Scar.

The next question comes from Dragonmanvirus0007. His question is:

This Q is 2 Alphonse:

What is your favorite memory?

and let's not leave out Edward:

When are you and Winry finally gonna suck it up and admit you love each other, hmm?

Al: My favorite memory is when Ed and I first learned about alchemy. We were so excited to learn about it. When we first showed mother our first transmution she was so happy! So that is my favorite memory.

Ed: I don't love winry damn it! She is my friend! She throws wrenches at my head! Why would I love someone who throws tools at my head!

Well everyone seems to be having alot of fun answering everyone's questions. Leave your questions in the review section please! 


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